Balancing Rules and Relationships: Avoiding Rebellion and Building Trust With Your Kids

 Today, we're diving into a critical aspect of parenting: the balance between rules and relationship. Have you ever found yourself laying down the law with your kids, only to face pushback and rebellion? It's a common struggle many parents face when they focus heavily on enforcing rules but neglect the crucial element of relationship-building. Without a strong connection, kids are less likely to trust and follow your guidance. We'll explore how this dynamic plays out and discuss strategies to ensure that your rules are respected because they come from a place of love and trust, not just authority. 

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Transcript

Parenting Structure vs. Nurture Balance

Speaker 1 0:00

Welcome to Brain-Based Parenting, the Boys Ranch podcast for families. We all know how hard being a parent is and sometimes it feels like there are no good answers to the difficult questions families have when their kids are struggling. Our goal each week will be to try and answer some of those tough questions, utilizing the knowledge, experience and professional training Cal Farley's Boys Ranch has to offer. Now. Here is your host. Cal Farley's Boys Ranch has to offer Now. Here is your host. Cal Farley's Staff Development Coordinator, joshua Sprock.

Speaker 2 0:30

Hello and welcome. Today we're going to start a new series on how to implement structure and nurture in your home.

Speaker 3 0:34

To do that today, I'm joined by Suzanne Wright, Vice President of Training and Intervention.

Speaker 4 0:40

Sam Cerna, Assistant Administrator of Residential Programs.

Speaker 5 0:43

Catherine Clay, Director of Clinical Services.

Speaker 2 0:46

All right, let's kick off today with our question of the day. Since we're talking about structure and nurture today, I thought I would ask you what are you more comfortable with providing structure or providing nurture?

Speaker 3 0:55

I think I'm definitely on the structure end of that spectrum.

Speaker 5 1:00

I thought I was on the structure end of that spectrum until I had kids and I realized I'm more of a nurturer, which is interesting. I mean, I find myself, even in parenting my own kids, having to be more aware of providing more structure than what I naturally provide.

Speaker 4 1:14

Well, I think I'm kind of balanced, but I probably will lean more towards nurture, which I also like. Catherine believed I was more structured. Wow, I think I'm a pretty nurturing person.

Speaker 2 1:23

When I first started at Boys Ranch, I was all nurture, but now I'm all structure. I like to have a schedule and everything to be followed. So let's say I'm all rules, rules, rules and I'm not really focused too much on relationship. What's going to happen with our kids?

Speaker 5 1:39

Yeah, I mean, I think, to come into a situation with a kid and have a lot of rules and not have established rapport or connection or relationship, you're going to get a lot of pushback. You know, for my kids personal kids and even kids I work with half the reason they follow my lead is because they trust me and they know that I have their best interest at heart and that's built through relationship. And so they're more likely to say I'll give this a try. I don't know, but I'll give it a try because I trust you. And so they're more likely to say I'll give this a try. I don't know, but I'll give it a try because I trust you.

Speaker 3 2:06

So to me it's pushback and rebellion. When I think of rules without relationship, I think about boot camp, and the instructors at boot camp are all about rules and ensuring that you follow structure, that you comply, that you conform, and they don't worry a lot about relationship. It's a short-term interaction and at the end of that you're going to go on. You probably won't see that drill instructor again, and the reason that the new recruits are compliant is because they've signed their name to the dotted line and they don't have a choice right.

Speaker 3 2:38

But it's not. They are not at that point complying because they trust or have a relationship, so, but it's a very different goal and it's a very different outcome we try to do with kids.

Speaker 4 2:50

I think it's interesting that statement, because everywhere you go you see the rules posted right and you follow the rules and oftentimes, like if I go to a pool, there's rules for the pool, that's just a standard. Obviously, I don't have a relationship with who made the rules, so I think the rules provide us the structure we need to know how to operate in this environment. But in parenting you do need to have the relationships because eventually the rules I know. When people see them, the kids used to say, hey, those are stupid rules, I don't understand why you have that rule, and so we'd have to have discussions and I think that's how relationships. I think without the relationship, the rules eventually don't matter.

Speaker 3 3:22

Did the relationship, the rules, eventually don't matter? Did you ever say that growing up, sam?

Speaker 4 3:24

Yes, this is a stupid rule and I don't follow your rule. Yes, but in case my mom hears this podcast.

Speaker 2 3:32

So what about the opposite side of that? What if I'm love, love, love and just don't care about the rules? I'm just relationship all the time? What is that going to result in? That is the role of the grandparent.

Speaker 3 3:43

That's kind of the opposite of the drill sergeant in boot camp is the grandparent. I've heard a lot of parents say, wow, you're not grandparenting at all in the same way you parented me and that's because they don't have to worry about all the rules. But that leniency without structure is great for short term. It's lovely that you have somebody like that you can go visit for a weekend and eat all the candy you want and stay up late. But you've got to have that day to day structure to move forward, to learn how to function in society, to learn how to get along with other people.

Speaker 5 4:18

I think about some missed opportunities if we are only nurturing and lovey dovey with our kids right Like I think and this is I know this is what the episodes are about the balance of it all.

Speaker 5 4:28

But I think about in times when I've parented and the nurture took over, even though I thought, gosh, there needs to be a consequence here. Gosh, there was a behavior that was really significant. If I don't follow through with the cause and effect or the behavior has a consequence in my children, or children don't miss a lot of opportunity to learn and grow. And I think if that is the way that I parent, long term I will have potentially really entitled child or a child who can't experience a consequence or a child who can't experience something negative and work through it, because there's always been someone to come through and nurture her through it or him through it. So I think I know this episode's about the balance of it all. But just from my experience, leaning more on nurturing, I can see these things kind of play out where I have to get myself to provide the structure to balance out the nurture, because I kind of know what will come in the end or the result of that in an adult child.

Speaker 4 5:23

I agree with both of you. And the end or the result of that in an adult child, I agree with both of you.

Speaker 4 5:27

I do think if you are just so relational without rules, eventually it'll come to a point where the parent will have to enforce the rule and it's going to be a yeah, no, no, and so when you're friends with your kids, that's wonderful, but there has to be a difference and friends can tell friends no, or they can call each other names and things like that, and that's not really what we're looking for with parents.

Speaker 5 5:46

I think it's respectful to provide structure and nurture and then in return, I think with a good balance of that, you will get respect from your child right, because they know you love them and they know you can keep them safe and provide for them, and those have to be balanced.

Speaker 2 6:03

I think it's funny. At the beginning I mentioned that I started out as all relationship and what happened to me was I became a doormat and got walked all over by the kids and then I had to swing hard the other way and the response from the kids was like wait, I thought you were my friend and then it was big rebellion. So it was a hard swing both ways before I learned, like you guys kind of said, the balance of it. So if I'm getting rebellion from my child, what does that tell me and what should I do?

Speaker 3 6:29

I think that we always look at rebellion through a negative lens, but the fact is that separating from your parents is developmentally appropriate. So as kids get older and they start to develop more independence, it is natural that they want to be different from you, to separate from you. Remember, when children are little, they want your focus and attention. So you have a child who says watch me, watch me, watch me. And they do a somersault 45 times. And as they get older they're less interested in you watching them and they want their peers to watch them. Right, and that is part of that natural separation and rebellion. But that can be hard for us as parents to accept or to acknowledge that. That is typical development for children, and so I think it's helpful to recognize that. And then there's obviously rebellion that goes beyond that Rebellion, that is, they don't want to follow your rules and they don't agree with your values. And so recognize that normal separation and then discern what might be more serious rebellion.

Speaker 5 7:39

When I think about I don't know if rebellion is the word I'm thinking, but like if there is and I have young children, but just thinking about older children too if there's like a disruption in our connection, then I am more likely to see the pushback.

Establishing Boundaries With Unconditional Love

Speaker 5 7:52

And so anytime I either provide, you know, consultation to house parents, for example, or even with my own kids and I noticed that there's a lot of disruptive behavior I often ask when's the last time y'all spent time together? Or for my own kids, when my daughter, who is six, is pushing back a lot I've had to learn this, but I'm quick to say oh, she needs touch or she needs connection or she needs time. That's not about behavior. She just needs me to be with her or take interest in her, and then when I do that which is providing the nurture right, she can fall into what we need to do next and follow some of that structure. So when I notice her pushing back or not going with the flow or being a little harder than normal even her or older kids I think let's connect first and then I think we can probably move forward.

Speaker 3 8:39

I also think that even in rebellion, that we need to provide unconditional relationship right. So it's real easy to have a conditional relationship. You do what I want you to do and I love you. You behave the way I expect you to behave and you are rewarded in some way, and relationship is sometimes used as a reward. But what we need to provide for our children is unconditional regard. I love you no matter what. And that can be tough. They can throw out some behaviors that your initial response to that is to withdraw a relationship.

Speaker 3 9:15

But, that's where you've got to dig in hard and let them know I love you. I'm your mom or your dad or your caregiver. I love you regardless. That doesn't mean that I approve of or accept your behavior, but I love you and I'm going to stick with you.

Speaker 5 9:34

And that we're going to work through this together to accomplish the goal.

Speaker 5 9:36

I think there's so much fear and I don't have adult children but I think there's so much fear about that stage of life when they are differentiating right, when they're trying on new values and they're trying on new personalities or identity.

Speaker 5 9:47

Or, you know, they come home and they're interested in something you've never taught them in your home and there's fear that they're going to run with this and then their life is going to be so much different than what you'd hoped for and from what I found, not with my own kids, but just kids that I've worked with as adolescents who've been, who've grown and kind of come back. You know that the core values that they started with they end with, and the middle part, the gray part, the part where they're figuring it out, is just a small piece of the big picture. More times than not, they come back to what they were taught and what they believe in is what they were taught by people that they love, and I just think we get really wrapped up in fear that we're not going to get the kids back that we raised.

Speaker 2 10:35

And so when we do over-respond to to that or overreact to that or say not, in my house it's out of fear. Yeah, I've heard one someone say that being a parent is like a dance and we as the adults are the ones who lead the dance. So if the kid is giving us that rebellion, I think that tells us a lot about how we're leading the dance as well. So if I'm getting rebellion from my kid, maybe I'm focusing too much on rules and maybe I need to adjust how I'm leading the dance in step different and maybe provide some more of that nurture.

Speaker 2 10:57

So if I'm leading that dance and, on the other hand, I'm getting all walked over in my home and it's a complete state of chaos, what does that tell me and how should I respond to that?

Speaker 3 11:05

I think we know that children respond best to structure and routine and consistency, and that is certainly something that we proclaim in our care of children out here at Boys Ranch. But I think, as parents, each one of us would also agree that our own children functioned best when they knew what the expectations were. What is the routine of the day? Were what is the routine of the day? How do I respond so that there is consistency? Our brains like to know what's going to happen next. Our brains respond best to that consistency.

Speaker 3 11:38

It's not that you should never throw in a surprise, but imagine if you as an adult in your day only had surprises and I'm sure that some of the listeners work in fields where that may happen. I would think if you're a police officer, your day is full of surprises. Or even a nurse in a hospital. The difference is you've been trained to anticipate those surprises and your training prepares you to deal with that. So kids don't have that kind of training if it's constantly constant change and surprises every day. So that's why they need that structure and nurture and routine so that their brains can relax into that and focus on other things. Right, if I'm constantly worried about what's going to happen next? I can't sit in school and learn how to read or how to do a math problem, and so our brains respond best if we've got consistency.

Speaker 4 12:34

So if you find your home in chaos, you've got to remember to take a breath, and it's good that you've noticed it. Hey something's wrong, and if you've noticed it, I'm sure that others have noticed it.

Speaker 4 12:44

Your children have noticed it. So what do you do? Stay calm. I think there's a lot of conversation to be had. Think you know, introspect yourself. What am I doing wrong? Here's the other trick is if you have a partner or spouse, they have some thoughts about things. It's not always one person's fault that a thing's happening. Sometimes one of the persons allows more than the other and you have to find a way to balance right. And so, like we talked earlier, if I'm over too much on the nurture side, we're not telling you to stop nurturing. You have to continue that. But also, we got to start setting some boundaries. Hey, no, hey, bedtime's gonna be nine o'clock now. We're gonna try that and we're conversing about the things we're gonna change and why, especially if you got teenagers. Um, I do have adult children and I think, like you guys said, sometimes they do go find themselves and we got to be okay with those things. But but if it's the other hand, sometimes I think too far on the nurture side creates unsafety you know, because if they can just leave the house at will and you don't- know where they

Speaker 4 13:34

are. That's going to create tons of problems and unsafe. So one of the things we were good at, I think, was explaining to our kids why, as they get older, they get to know the more why. Why does things work that way? Because I'm trying to teach them to be parents too, and so you know the mistakes I made. I try to tell them. Here's why we do this. Here's why we're. It's probably it's important to have a bedtime. Here's why it's important to be in at a certain time. Here's why it's important that we we keep the same stuff every day Right and they, they get to know that and maybe even be part of the decision you never do this before and this and that.

Speaker 4 14:09

When we explain why we got to do it and let's hey, how can we come together and let's make this work together? Whether that means cleaning, whether that means bedtime, whatever it is, if they have a hand in it, you're highly more likely to be successful.

Speaker 5 14:21

Yeah, and I find that because I've had to do this a couple of times in my own home with my six-year-old, where I have been far too nurturing and things are chaos and I'm getting walked over right. And so the moments when I come to her and say, hey, I love you and we're going to have time in our room today, or I love you and bedtime's still at eight, I know your friends are still outside and if I have not set that boundary and it's a new boundary, wow, she is not into it. She will say she will push and push and push and push and push. And it is a challenge and it is up to me to continue to hold the line Right. I hear you it's frustrating, bedtime's at eight and that small statement is nurturing and structure, I love you. I hear you Mommy says bedtime is at eight, and I mean I probably say it 10 times that night and finally she goes to bed. But it is not easy to hold that line. It is not easy to hold that line right Because you are trying on a new skill and you're setting a new boundary and you know it might be easier if you just let her stay up till nine o'clock, she wouldn't argue with you.

Speaker 5 15:23

The day could go on, but then what does that show her? That she's in charge? Sam said a minute ago about safety being connected with structure right, and lack of structure feeling unsafe. And there are times when there's lack of structure in my home or in homes that we have out here at Boys Ranch, and it's chaos because the kids feel like or my daughter or whoever it feels like they have to set the structure or the rules, or I'm in charge, but they don't have the skill and they don't have the experience and they don't have the wisdom, and so it does become chaotic. And then I think if you're, if you have kids that are feeling like they have to set the rules or they have to set the tone, that's like a huge red flag that we need to reset some boundaries in the homes.

Balancing Rules and Relationships

Speaker 3 16:03

I agree, and I think that when you do make a change, and maybe you set a new rule in the home, you've got to ride out that resistance right. So think it through. Don't. Don't make a change or a rule offhanded, in the heat of the moment, when you're feeling frustrated or angry, but once you make that change you have to see it through, regardless of the complaining or the whining or the resistance. This is the rule, it's going to be the rule and you hold to that. And it's so hard. It is hard, but it's just, it's so important. If it wasn't important, you probably shouldn't have made the new rule Right.

Speaker 3 16:39

And so I think a lot of times as a parent, when my children were younger, no just fell out of my mouth too often before I thought about it. Right, and so I had to train myself to stop and think is no really appropriate? Or could I give a yes? But if I gave a no, it was going to say no right, because I had carefully considered that. So be thoughtful, be considerate. When you change rules or implement new rules, make sure that they're purposeful and that they do serve your family. But once you've made that decision, it is up to you to hold the line.

Speaker 5 17:16

I like that. I think I heard someone say to give as many yeses as you can give.

Speaker 1 17:20

Right.

Speaker 5 17:21

And sometimes my daughter asks me to do or even my son asked me to do things that I don't like Slime sand, things that are dirty and my first response is, absolutely that's gross. No, just like you have to train myself to say, yeah, go ahead, have fun, and that because there's no harm, right, everybody's safe, they're just kids, they're playing. Just because I don't like it or my gut says that's horrible, the no that comes later in the day just is accepted a little bit better because there's a lot of yeses today, and so I think that just being mindful of the balance of it all is important too.

Speaker 2 17:56

So what does it mean to have rules within the context of a relationship?

Speaker 3 18:00

I've heard it said before that kids don't care about the rules until they know that you care about them, and I think that's true, and Catherine led with that. If you have a relationship with a child, the rules are easier for them to follow because they trust that you have their best interest at heart. They may not like the rules, but they know you love them, they know that you care for them. Josh, you frequently give in training an example of putting money in a piggy bank, which I think would be a great example to use now if you want to share that.

Speaker 2 18:33

Yeah, I've heard that kids are a lot like a piggy bank. All of us are that. When we meet kids needs and take care of them, that's like putting a deposit into that piggy bank and you do that as the kids grow older and there's thousands and thousands of those deposits that go into that piggy bank. And then when you have to actually do a redirection of a kid, that's like a withdrawal from their emotional piggy bank. Now, for most kids, they have a lot of emotional capital in their piggy bank. So if you have to do a redirection, while it may not be fun or something you're thrilled to do, in the end there's still money left in the bank and they're going to be okay. Now, a lot of kids if they don't have that, then you have to do that redirection and they're emotionally bankrupt. It just doesn't go as well. So if you're more naturally on one side of this continuum than the other, how should you handle that?

Speaker 4 19:24

Well, again, if you realize this, that's a good thing. You know, if you found, you know your gut tells you something's wrong and you got to make the adjustment All right. So I think we've talked about it in the last couple of questions, kind of hey, we got to. If I am too nurturing, I got to figure out how do I implement a little bit of structure and a little bit at a time.

Speaker 4 19:42

How do I see cooperation before coercion? I like to tell people that see cooperation right. The other hand, well, maybe I got to be a little more relational, spend a little more time with people, the other, the kids, or anything like that. So that's kind of what I think you got to find how to go the other way.

Speaker 3 19:56

When we started with that first question, I think I was the only one that said I lean towards structure, and so I have always had to remember to have fun with my kids right, because I'm really great at structure and routine, but I wasn't very good at sitting down to play with kids or remembering to inject some fun things on a day-to-day basis, and so that was just again being aware of it, like Sam said, but then also choosing to say it's not really important that I get whatever I think needs to be done done because I'm also a task-oriented person, I can set that aside and I can just be in the moment with my children and play and have fun, because those you know, those are the memory makers is that we had fun together or we accomplished a task together, or I think that's very important.

Speaker 3 20:47

I don't think it could happen without the structure being present, but I had to remember that, within the context of structure, relationship was important.

Navigating Parenting Structure and Nurture

Speaker 2 20:56

I think I mentioned when I first started, I was that pushover nurturer and thankfully I had some people in my life who were actually really good on the other side, on the structure side, and they kind of took me under their wing and kind of helped guide me in that. So seeking out some mentorship, I think, is always a good idea to help with that too. What are some common misconceptions about providing structure and nurture?

Speaker 5 21:16

I think that we believe that too much nurture can spoil a child. They have to learn, they have to be able to be an adult and no one's going to come around and hug them when they're sad, when they're 30 or whatever it may be. And so I think there's some misconceptions about too much nurture can be a bad thing, and I think again it just goes back to like too much nurture, probably without the same amount of equal structure, could present some problems. Same amount of equal structure could present some problems. But and then I think the other piece about misconceptions about structure is that it's painful and it's uncomfortable and it's discipline and it's punishment. You know, and I think that's not at all what structure is.

Speaker 2 21:53

So how should you adapt your structure and nurture as your child grows older?

Speaker 5 21:56

I think being aware of just kind of what Suzanne said at the beginning developmental stages and what, how much structure a one year old needsold needs versus a 15-year-old is going to be very different. Right like the structure I provide for a one, two, three-year-old is a lot about safety and a lot about rhythm and building some capacity for regulation and that type of stuff. And by the time they're 15 they should have some of that stuff kind of intrinsically and the structure I might provide is probably still going to be about safety. But also it's different when they're 15. Because, again, they're not looking to me to provide that, they're looking to peers to provide some of this stuff. So being aware of developmental changes and shifts and personalities and all the things that are specific to your kid- what do y'all think?

Speaker 4 22:40

How do people know where to find those kind of things? Milestones, yeah. What do y'all think about?

Speaker 3 22:49

How do they know or how do they find out those things? I think that you know we get a lot of feedback if we're open to that. So I think, as we take our child for well child visits, you know our pediatricians are giving us some feedback and information about what's appropriate for this age, and they're a great resource if you're not sure, if you ever feel like there's a developmental task your child hasn't hit on target. I think, also, if you utilize daycare services, you've got some feedback there you can access, and I know that in previous podcasts, catherine and Chloe talked about using daycare or teachers as almost co-parents right, using daycare or teachers as almost co-parents, right is a valuable resource, and so I think, too, that teachers their goal is the success of every child, so they're just as much interested in your child being successful as you are, and if you will develop that communication with them, they could be really helpful, so that, again, if you're not sure how your child is managing you know, but also having realistic expectations.

Speaker 3 23:46

I'll give you an example. My sister is a teacher and at one point she was teaching sixth grade and had a student who never turned in his homework. And she ended up in a parent meeting with the principal who was also involved, and the parent said well, did you look in his backpack for his homework? So we're talking about a sixth grader, right, who's capable of looking through their own backpack. And the end result of that was a principal who suggested that my sister do exactly that that she look through the child's backpack for homework. And so sometimes there are unrealistic expectations, right, what do we expect for our kids? What would a teacher expect? So I think you have to balance that, right, what do we expect for our kids? What would a teacher?

Speaker 2 24:27

expect.

Speaker 3 24:27

So I think you have to balance that right. Sometimes we don't want to hold our kids accountable because we don't want them to feel that sting of discipline. But, Catherine, you know alluded to that earlier that you want to prepare kids developmentally, age appropriate. So you know, if I am here at work and my boss asked me for a document and I say, well, did you go look on my desk, How's that?

Speaker 5 24:47

going to work out for me, I think, too, it's easy. It's just very easy to get in this comparison space. Oh my gosh, that little boy's already potty trained. Oh my goodness, you walked at nine months, and I just think you know. It's important to realize that we all develop differently, at different rates, and most of the time, when you're 25, 30, 35, or 40, no one's going to know who walked first, that's right.

Speaker 2 25:11

No one's going to know. That's so true.

Speaker 5 25:13

You know, and no one's going to know who spoke first and all these different things. And so, while it's important to be aware, you know and I think same with what Suzanne's saying all those natural feedback, teachers, doctors, that kind of stuff, even your own observation of your child in peer groups is cool to watch and observe. Also, with that in mind, be cautious about starting comparison so quick. You know, and I think too, like once you're in a and this is just my experience Once I had kids and I got into a small, like mom's type group of similar-aged kids, we did get to share, you know, and it just normalized hey, he hasn't walked yet. Yeah, mine, my baby, didn't walk till, whatever, you know, and I think you kind of get in a space where you can be a little bit less of a comparison with other kids. But just be mindful of that too, because it can be difficult.

Speaker 3 25:56

I saw a meme that said as a child, I was led to believe that reading above my grade level would be much more important as an adult than it is. Right, and so here we are. I have no idea if any of you read above your grade level. Some of those mile markers that we focus on so heavily for young children are kind of irrelevant in adulthood. So that's a good reminder.

Speaker 5 26:19

Catherine, Because we assume or think that that's somehow a reflection of what we've provided for our kids. If my child walks by one, then I'm doing it well right. Which is just a lot of pressure. Yeah, I mean it's all of it. All of it's about a reflection of our own parenting and how well we're doing, and it's just tough.

Speaker 4 26:38

Well, what I'm hearing is that, and the reason I asked was because I was just for listeners, so they could find resources, because sometimes you just don't know. When you're a parent and you don't have resources, you're just kind of winging it.

Speaker 4 26:51

And so you think, like you all said, you think, hey, I'm just comparing myself to other people or comparing my child. That's why I asked that question. And one thing I heard you all say we talked about little kids. It sounds like little kids. They're hitting these milestones quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. My.

Speaker 4 27:01

I noticed that little kids require a lot more structure I gotta provide that for two-year-olds, for little kids, and then I know, you know, as I go I raise teenagers, so as we go I start letting them be a little more free and try new things and put on, put on that clothes I would never wear and you know all those things and let them go.

Speaker 4 27:19

you know, and I also know, like you know, there's a time where you try to iron fist your kids or you try to say, hey, we're not doing that, or don't let them go explore as teens, and then they rebel, and then you have arguments, and you know. So it's this kind of balance that parents always got to be through. So I guess, to answer the question right, it sounds like we start with a lot more structure when they're younger and we slowly, slowly as we teach as we grow as we learn we together decide, okay, what's appropriate for our teens as they get a little bit older.

Parenting Contact and Support Information

Speaker 2 27:48

Well, thank you for structuring some time with us today. If you'd like to contact us and ask us a question, our email address is podcasts at calfarleyorg. I'll leave a link in the description. Also, if you haven't already, please follow and subscribe to the show and leave us a five-star review and tell a friend as always.

Speaker 1 28:08

Remember you might have to loan out your frontal lobes today. Just make sure you get them back. Thank you for listening to Brain Based Parenting. We hope you enjoyed this show. If you would like more information about Cal Farley's Boys Ranch, are interested in employment, would like information about placing your child or would like to help us help children by donating. Thank you for spending your time with us and have a blessed day.