Brain Based Parenting
Brain Based Parenting, The Boys Ranch Podcast for families.
We all know how hard being a parent is, and sometimes it feels like there are no good answers to the difficult questions families have when their kids are struggling.
Our goal each week will be to try and answer some of those tough questions utilizing the knowledge, experience, and professional training Cal Farley’s Boys Ranch has to offer.
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podcasts@calfarley.org
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For More Information about Cal Farley's Boys Ranch:
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Brain Based Parenting
Help!!!! My Kid Won't Get Off Their Phone: Simple Strategies To Get Your Kids More Active
We explore how everyday movement regulates kids’ brains, lifts moods, and strengthens family bonds, then trade practical ways to make activity normal, fun, and realistic. From garage gyms to free play and turkey trots, we show how tiny steps become lasting habits.
• why physical activity regulates mood and brain development
• modeling movement as parents through daily routines
• realistic active family habits without perfection
• balancing organized sports with unstructured free play
• engaging shy or nonathletic kids through low-pressure options
• replacing screens with connection and active fun
• overcoming barriers like time, weather and discomfort
• simple first steps and backup plans for consistency
Give the podcast a five-star review
Contact:
podcasts@calfarley.org
To Donate:
https://secure.calfarley.org/site/Donation2?3358.donation=form1&df_id=3358&mfc_pref=T
To Apply:
https://apply.workable.com/cal-farleys-boys-ranch/j/25E1226091/
For More Information about Cal Farley's Boys Ranch:
https://www.calfarley.org/
Music:
"Shine" -Newsboys
CCS License No. 9402
Welcome to Brain-Based Parenting, the Boys Ranch podcast for families. We all know how hard being a parent is, and sometimes it feels like there are no good answers to the difficult questions families have when their kids are struggling. Our goal each week will be to try and answer some of those tough questions, utilizing the knowledge, experience, and professional training Cal Farley's Boys Ranch has to offer. Now here is your host, Cal Farley Staff Development Coordinator, Joshua Sprock.
SPEAKER_01:Hello and welcome. Today we're going to talk about how we can best create healthy environments for our families by becoming more active.
SPEAKER_02:To do that, today I'm again joined by Suzanne Wright, Vice President of Training and Intervention. Chloe Hewitt, Youth Programs Administrator.
SPEAKER_04:Sam Cerna, Assistant Administrator of Residential Communities.
SPEAKER_01:All right, let's kick off our discussion by being active by jumping into our question of the day. So, how would you rate your current physical activity level and what is your favorite active outdoor activity?
SPEAKER_02:I'm gonna say that my current activity level is fairly low. It's just like anything else, it's a habit, and I have gotten out of the habit. And my favorite outdoor activity is walking.
SPEAKER_03:I guess how would I rate? I guess good. I love to be very good. Very good. I love to be active. So my favorite outdoor activity is probably if it's an activity, it's running. But it actually, what my favorite activity would be is to do a workout outside is one of my favorite things to do in the sunshine.
SPEAKER_04:My current activity level is extreme. And if you know, you know. But I'm doing two workouts a day, 45 minutes each, and one of them has to be outside. My most common workout activity outside is walking, which I hate. But really, what I like doing, I bought this thing. Well, I bought a I bought a workout device and it's it uses bands, and I like to be outside in my backyard, even at night by a fire, and I'll do lifting in my backyard. So that's my current favorite outdoor activity. Josh?
SPEAKER_01:I'd say I'm mid. I am somewhat active, not as much as I used to be. I would say my favorite is hiking. And Suzanne, you sell yourself short. Last year, you and I hiked to the top of uh Diamondback, which is not an easy hike, and we did that pretty good, I'd say.
SPEAKER_02:That's true. That's true.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and I also Josh and I just ran a 5K like not that long ago. He was we didn't even know we were both doing it, and then we saw each other at the beginning.
SPEAKER_01:So well, I would say yes, we saw each other at the beginning, and then you passed me, and then we've been see each other for a long, long time. All right, so why is physical activity so essential to children's physical, emotional, and brain development?
SPEAKER_03:You know, I think they thrive better when they are active, right? And we know that they need to do big movement. And so, and I honestly would venture to say it's not even necessarily children. I think we as adults are better if we are doing a physical activity regularly. And then I recently heard, it was funny, I was sitting this week, my daughter had a program we were sitting across from some other parents, and they said their pediatrician told them to get their son out every day to run just a little bit, and so to run with your son every day. And so I thought that was interesting. Even pediatricians are now giving that advice.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. We know from all the brain training that we do here on our campus that that physical movement is regulating. And so the more physical movement that kids can engage in, the more it helps regulate their brain, which leads to not only the ability to be calm, but it leads to healthy brain development.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, well, the human body was designed to move. Yeah. And so we're not designed to be sitting still for long periods of time. And that's just, you know, I don't know all the science behind it. But yeah, you know, when we go outside, you know, anybody who's lifted can attest when you lift weights or you do it, yeah, it's not fun and it kind of hurts or whatever. But afterwards, your body thanks you. It tells you, hey, I'm I'm good and you're maybe clearer. It's just something about any kind of workout you do that, hey, my your body kind of tells you, I like this. Yeah, we should do this more.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. You feel better when you're done. It really does release that feeling, and there's the science to back it up that it literally and releases it to make you feel better.
SPEAKER_01:And my daughters were high school athletes, and they they during the school year and when they were active, they were always in a better mood. But over like Christmas break and stuff like that, a lot of times they would kind of take it easy and not work out as much, and they were always grumpy like during those downtimes. So I I would always encourage you guys gotta get out and run, otherwise, this isn't gonna go well for anyone. But I think it does regulate us emotionally as well as physically.
SPEAKER_03:Well, and I think the beauty, I love that you just said that, Josh, because I we keep my son in a sport always. And one of the things I've realized is it doesn't just get him moving, it also helps him work on team building skills. And you know, right now he's in basketball, so he's having to learn how to dribble with both his right and his left, even though he really wants to just use his right, but it even works on both sides. Like, so I just think there's so many benefits to learning different sports, but also what it does for their peer relationships and team building. And you know, Josh says it best, and it's in he says it in so many podcasts, but even them getting advice or learning from another adult is so powerful too. So just even from coaches' point of view, they're just being poured into by others.
SPEAKER_04:I mean, you said it too. I mean, it it'll increase hand-eye coordination, you know, some muscle, some muscle strength, just walking or running around. So they just can they their bodies can just move better too.
SPEAKER_01:So, what does a healthy active lifestyle realistically look like for the average family today?
SPEAKER_03:You know, I it's one of those things we talk, we've talked a lot about, but they watch everything you do. And so ironically, I I say that all the time. My husband's a firefighter, so a lot of times it's not ideal for me to go to a gym. So I created a gym in my garage. And so I currently work out, and then my kids on Saturdays, Saturday mornings is my favorite thing to get up and work out in my garage, and I have a couple of hours, and my daughter will bring all her toys out there, and then my son will bring all his, and now we have a basketball goal, so he'll shoot. So they just play or they will sometimes join in on the workout. So I have a bike, an air assault, assault bike, and so when I get on my bike as part of the workout, they'll get on their bikes and take off down the street and and and I'll say, We got 10 more seconds, you gotta stay on. And so we make it a game and it makes them part of theirs. And so I think they are gonna watch what you do. If you are active, they want to be active too. But even if you're not like, hey, I don't love to work out, then even just getting outside and walking while they bike or doing something active with them, because when you're outside, they want to be where you're at.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, I'm not and I don't I don't I don't know what the average is. I would um I would imagine that just getting out and doing stuff. Well, we just said it, you know, the kids like to be around you. When you got teenagers, well then you gotta you gotta put them in things, or maybe they're already in athletics and they're getting what they need out of that. And maybe you're going along with them and going to practice. Uh but it's I'm I'm not really sure the average.
SPEAKER_03:Um well and I think even like watching them, right? Like, so one of the things I didn't say is that Josh's girls ran with him in that 5K. And so I thought that was so cool to be like, oh man, like that just gave me hope that like when I'm older, will they do an activity with me like that? So I but all that to say, even if we're going to watch them play a sport or we're going to support them, if it is just riding their bike, they know we're near them. So I think all those things is an average kind of right now, is that if they're in sports, knowing you're there and cheering them on is part of that too.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I think Chaplin Wilhelm said this in an another podcast that, you know, screens really are one of the things that take away from the active lifestyle. Kids are more drawn to screens. But what he said, and I think it was just so powerful that the reason they're drawn to screens is because we allow them to be on that, and we're also on our screen. So we have to give them something different to be able to be drawn to. And if we're active, they're gonna be active. I love that you said that too, that yeah, passion is contagious. If we like it, if we're excited about it, they're gonna want to jump in and follow us. But if we just let them be on a screen, they're gonna choose that as opposed to getting out there.
SPEAKER_03:Well, and I will say, like, sometimes it's out of your own comfort level. I actually don't enjoy riding bikes, and my husband bought a bike after my son learned. He was like, We can go with him. And my husband was going with him pretty regularly, and I remember the first time my son asked me to do it, I was like, I don't want to do it. I don't I haven't ridden a bike in 20 years. And I got on and did it, but the whole time I was scared, I was way behind him, and he would just come back around for me. And I never, I just I just said, Hey, mom's trying to like kind of get comfortable again and a little scared. I think I told him I was a little scared, and he's like, It's all right, mom. You you remember if you think you can, you can. It's because I kind of used the little engine that could when I was teaching him. And so I think that's reality too, is sometimes it might be out of our comfort zone, but if it's in there, it's trying to meet them where they're at.
SPEAKER_02:I was never an athlete, but all three of my daughters were very active athletes, you know, through high school and continue to be. And you know, my youngest played basketball for several years, and I can't get out there and play basketball with you, but I can stand under the goal and catch that ball and throw it back. You know, it was just just being there, being present and part of that.
SPEAKER_01:What an amazing part of their childhood memory you get to be that you're like cornerstone of their right there with them in all those the good times, the bad times, the rainy weather, the good we yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, we always teased our youngest daughter that we were really grateful she chose an indoor sport in basketball. Like we didn't have to sit out in the hot and the cold. We got a nice air-conditioned gym to sit in. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So how can parents model an active lifestyle in a way that feels natural rather than just forced?
SPEAKER_02:I think exactly what Chloe described is that our kids are just part of it. It's just something we see mom do all the time. It's just part of it. It seems normal. It doesn't seem forced.
SPEAKER_03:I have a neighbor that also has a full gym. She actually has a more of a home gym than I do. She has every I'm I'm like so jealous. But she a lot of times we'll do a workout together and she has four kids and then my two. And so they'll be all six around us. But what I think is funny is that they'll also start cheering us on when we're getting close to ending. But then they also will might get on her runner while we're doing it and they're trying to like take turns running. And so they really do start incorporating it is part of their natural with box jumps or different things. So it's really interesting to watch if it becomes like part of yours. One of the things we do have a gym membership, and I go every now and then, and they have a whole like the kids zone has a whole workout thing for the kids. And so we always tell them, we're like, okay, you can they have a screen, obviously. And so we tell them, like, you have to play, you can't just watch your screen, like go watch the TV. And so sometimes I come in and they're literally doing a bike while I walk in. So I think they do, they watch everything you see, and then also exposing them to different things that they can try.
SPEAKER_04:Also, you know, talking about it, hey, we this is important to me, or this is a change I'm making, and that way you they at least know what you're doing. Hey, I'm gonna be gone for 10 minutes because I'm going on a little walk. Things like that, and maybe they'll join you.
SPEAKER_03:You know, I love that you say that because that's usually what happens to me is if I say I'm gonna go for a walk, my kids are like, Yes, I'm going with you.
SPEAKER_01:So, what might be some simple fun ways families can incorporate movement into their daily, everyday routines?
SPEAKER_04:I used to love playing tag in the house with my kids, hide and go seek, and instead of sitting on the couch, we're just running around the house looking for each other and things like that.
SPEAKER_02:Just even go into a park, you know, where you can push them on the swings or on the merry-go-round, or again, like Chloe said before, the most important thing is that you're together, that you're doing it with them.
SPEAKER_04:One time we played Pokemon Go, and we went down, we went down Maine and and in Amarillo, and we just started just chasing the little Pokemons and stuff, and that just moves us from point. And that's kind of the point of the game, I believe. You know. But we did that for a while as a family too.
SPEAKER_03:That was really fun. Yeah, my son plays soccer, and I did not grow up playing soccer. My husband did, but then with his schedule, sometimes I have to help him do his soccer homework. I was like trying to do it with him, and he's like, Well, and then so he kind of thought it was fun because I'm like learning it with him. I'm frustrated trying to learn how to roll the ball with my foot. But he thought it was interesting that like I was trying to do it instead of dad that time. You know, one time I did go for a run, and my son said, Hey, I'm gonna go with you, and he ran a mile with me, and then he said, Well, I want to keep going, but I need to go get my bike. So we ran back to the house, got his bike, and he biked while I ran my second mile. So I think just you know, offering maybe can can they go with me?
SPEAKER_01:I think oftentimes parenting can feel really, really hard, but doing all these things that you guys were talking about actually sounds fun. And I think focusing on those things might actually make the hard times a little bit easier to easier to get through.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, that's so true.
SPEAKER_01:So, how do we balance organized sports with the value of unstructured free play?
SPEAKER_02:I think that that you can overorganize small children's lives. When when my oldest was young, she was in gymnastics for several years and she was young, let's say five or six, and I was listening to two other mothers say Monday's ballet and Tuesday is gymnastics and Wednesday is soccer, Thursday is track, and Friday is this, and Saturday we and I thought, wow, when do they play? You know, I do think their time that should be set aside for kids just to use their imagination and to have free play where not every moment is organized. I think it it develops their creativity.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, some of my most favorite memories of my girls when they were little was their free play and just listening to their imaginations go crazy and the silly things that they would come up with and do. But you can't get that if you just every day is structured and you have athletic sports going on every single day.
SPEAKER_02:I think they're both valuable, but there ought to be some balance.
SPEAKER_03:I I love, yeah. So I said earlier we always keep my son in the sport, but we typically only put him in one at a time. He's begging me in the spring to let him do two because his friends all play baseball and he plays soccer, but he loves soccer, but he wants to be with his friends too. And so I said we have to talk about it. But I do think that I like them to have free play. My daughter cracks me up, she plays office. I've probably said that before. She gets a tablet out, she gets a phone out, and she talks to HR all the time. I don't know if she tells them. She also frequently talks about you and my my my co-workers a lot, and so it makes me laugh. That's her free play, is that she plays like mini office and and mom, she plays with her babies. Yeah, it's role modeling. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:I think also there's you know, when you're in organized sports, there's an adult in charge. Uh the the most fun times I ever had as a kid was the kids are in charge. You know, obviously, well, there's no we we weren't very supervised in that we were able to run the neighborhood and play soldiers or play whatever. And you know, it's it's a cool way for them to learn how to cooperate, uh, a cool way for you know to pretend you said imagination and creativity and exploring. It's just there's just such value to kids being in charge of their own little, you know, time to play.
SPEAKER_03:I love that. Like we my son will create games. He'll say, Okay, we're gonna play this dinosaur game. And like he'll say, Mom, you're this type, or you get to pick, and like we don't really know what he's wanting, he just wants us to battle in his room. But he like gets to be in charge of how we play the game, um, and it makes him the most excited.
SPEAKER_01:So, how can parents encourage children who are shy, anxious, or not naturally athletic to still enjoy being active? That was me.
SPEAKER_04:I was a very shy, anxious, not I don't know if I was anxious, but I was not an athletic kid. I grew up around other kids who were just way more, and I had no interest. I was more of a think tank, do it. But then, you know, my mom encouraged me to go outside and make friends, and I made other friends, and turns out, you know, I really like playing outside, and you know, we got into sports as as a group of kids and as teenagers, and I don't know. I mean, think my mom just saying, Hey, you gotta get out there.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, I think you encourage your kids to try a lot of different things. You know, my oldest immediately found something that she was interested in, which was gymnastics. But like my my middle daughter tried gymnastics for a little while and and then taekwondo, and then it was some you know, then it was so it took her longer to find something she really enjoyed, but I just kept encouraging her to try something different. And you know, there sometimes the the barrier is that sports can be really expensive. You know, and so getting involved in activities that are, you know, just community activities, they're again go to the park, playing games with neighborhood kids, it doesn't necessarily have to be a sport that you pay for and buy equipment for.
SPEAKER_03:Well, I love that. Like, even because cause even being active, you can be outside. So one of my son's favorite activities used to be just getting his dump trucks and getting near a pile of dirt and like scooping it like he was or giving him like a spoon or something, and he was like dumping it back and forth. And so it even getting them outside, I know that's what Wilhelm said in that one, is really powerful too, even if it's not necessarily like moving their bodies, but they're still outside, they're getting a change of scenery. And so I think that's powerful. I also have some friends who they have a kid that's very shy and and just like this, not very athletic, but they put him in it's this kid strong thing that they have in Emerlo, but all essentially what it is is it works on agility and movement. And what they were telling me is like, hey, he doesn't naturally come by it, but he's loving this because like he's in a group class and then they're kind of like all like at different levels, but he and then he earns like as he develops skill, he gets like a new little notch. And so I think that was cool because he hadn't been anything and he's like 12 and he's like doing that now. And so I think it's like what you said, Suzanne, trying different things, and maybe something sticks. You never quite know. You won't know till you let him try it. And sometimes it does take a little push, I think.
SPEAKER_04:I also think the adults being involved is important. One of my favorite memories uh as a kid was my one of my best friend's uncles. They would come every now and then, the the two uncles, they were and they would want to play football with all the all the like young kids. And there was me who wasn't very good, but each of the uncles would take a team, and they you know, we were gonna we're gonna play touch football. And I remember him moving his finger along his hand. This is the plan, Sammy. You're gonna move here, you're gonna go there, and you're gonna go and you're gonna cross. And they're teaching us, right? And they're the quarterbacks because they can throw the ball and they can hand off and they would block for us or pick us up. You know, all that that cool contact, you know, that we had with them is one of my favorite memories of learning how to play a sport. And I think that's really important for the kid because there's there's an adult involved.
SPEAKER_02:One of Cal Farley's sayings was, I'm probably gonna bitch of this, but basically, there's no fun in hitting a home run if there's nobody there to cheer for you. So again, that that parental involvement, grandparents, aunts, uncles, neighbors, whoever that is, you know, needs to be there encouraging. It it doesn't have the same effect if you drop them off and aren't there, you know, to cheer them on. So really important to be involved.
SPEAKER_01:So in a screen heavy world, what practical strategies can help kids choose movement over passive entertainment?
SPEAKER_02:You know, those connections with other people are way more rewarding to your brain, even than a screen. So if they're building friendships with with kids on the team, if they've got a coach who gives positive feedback, or you know, like for Sam, those, you know, the uncles of a friend that showed up, like that was important to him. They knew him by name, they called him, you know, they they they encouraged him. Those those things are way more powerful, but it also takes more time and effort on the part of adults. The easiest thing to do is give your kid a screen. And they and they go in their room and and they're not bothering you, right? But it takes a lot more effort to get them involved in some some activity, and that's that's really on us as adults.
SPEAKER_03:One of the things that has been interesting, my husband coached my son's soccer team last spring. He didn't get to coach this fall because he was working too much of it. But I so I had to be his assistant coach, and I was the most nervous. I was like, You're gonna be gone, and I'm gonna be. But I did have to do a couple of practices and I researched and I wrote a whole plan out, but all that. Of course she did, Chloe. And it was so stressful for me. But I remember thinking it was like Leighton's favorite time. He was like, My parents are the coach, and I thought he was gonna hate it. And and all this year, he's like, Dad, when are you gonna coach me again? And so all that to say is it was interesting to me how much that meant to him. So maybe that is a strategy. It is more work, and maybe not all the time, but I learned something about myself that I could do it, and I was brave. And and honestly, it made my kids world. And so maybe that is maybe you coach one time, even if it's something simple. And so I think that's a strategy you could try to.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, I mean, there's a then there's the obvious stuff, put limits on screen times or combine it, right? There are apps that get people moving, or maybe that or maybe they hey put turn on your timer, go for a walk. You can still have it, but don't be looking at your screen, you gotta walk so you can put this where you go. Whatever it is, right? Maybe there's a way to combine some activity with the device.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Or, you know, we gotta do this before we get the device. I mean, if that's important to you, find a way to to do to do it.
SPEAKER_01:So, what might be some of the most common barriers that prevent families from staying active and how can they overcome them?
SPEAKER_02:It's busyness, right? We're too, we're too busy. We let other things take priority. I think physical activity is one of the things you have to look at with a long-term view, right? In five years and ten years, physical activity will have served me very well. Whereas screen timers sitting in watching a show may not, you know, how is that gonna serve me well in the long term? It might be it might seem to be more entertaining, but but we have to make it a priority.
SPEAKER_04:I said this in a previous podcast, and I'm gonna say it again. When you get on screens or they you play video games on, especially on your phones, those things are heavily marketed and targeted to keep you on them.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Suzanne had mentioned about a farm game or whatever. Hey, yeah, it's because they have these little things and timers. And you can check in in an hour and you got to check in. So it it essentially sucks your entire time. And your brain says, This is more fun. Let's also be real. Working out hurts. Like it can hurt. Like it's not, it's it's uncomfortable. If you gotta go outside because you don't have space in your house, you gotta get outside to do this stuff. You know, the weather could be bad. The you know, there could be dogs that chase you down the neighborhood. I mean, look, listen, I grew up hard, right? There's there's these things that these barriers, right? They're a little sometimes they're self-imposed. It's just easier to do this.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:I I can't because of X, you know. But you know, Chloe said, I built a gym. If you have a little bit of space, there's a way to do it. I found a website that the guy said, Hey, just do it on your couch and you can do some arm pulls with a gallon of milk, or or have these little objects around the house, lift your chairs, or and you can do something that stay active. So now that I'm into kind of extreme fitness currently, but 40-some days ago, that wasn't true. And you know, I like to sit around and watch TV. I've been the heaviest I ever am. I'm miserable, right? And the barrier became, hey, okay, I I realize I got a problem. I need to eat better, I need to, but I need to exercise too. But I couldn't walk. Like I I I would get out from one room and I'm limping, my feet are hurting. I I run the chains for football games. I remember we went long enough. I couldn't even like I was hurting, just moving down the field, and I'm like, oh my gosh. So then I started this program and I get I gotta I gotta go outside every day. So I start walking. Boy boy, does it hurt. I come inside, and I'm not walking fast. I'm talking in in 45 minutes, I'm not even doing two miles, right? I'm I'm walking slow and I come inside and I'm in so much pain, so I want to quit. But my wife's doing it with me too, so I have a little bit of motivation. But here's one thing I noticed in about two weeks, that kind of stopped. My body seems to have loosened up. I can move. I ran yesterday a little bit, not long, but it's because I said earlier, our bodies are designed to move. When we sit, we're you're going to tell your body, oh, this is what I have to do. What you program your body to do is what it's gonna do. Like Chloe gets a lot of value out of moving and lifting. Her body tells her that's what I'm doing, and it's built to do it now. Me sitting around for all those months, I did told my body, oh, we're not moving. This is where I'm safe. I also have read articles that say you your body doesn't want to move. You want to conserve energy at all times. That's why our brains fight us. Your brain is your worst enemy. It loves it when you do it. The motivation to do it is never gonna come for free. You have to earn that and have some discipline because you we're built biologically to conserve energy. Because, right, we had to go in bursts, chase the food, and get the food, and then I could I might not have food for a few days and I gotta chase the food, right? So these are just things I've read off the internet and podcasts I hear and things like that as well. Of course, this is the best podcast. It is but um, but uh nice but I just I just thought I wanted to say that because my body just feels better now. And now I yeah, exercise still ain't fun. I want to do other stuff with my 45 minutes. I got I've gotten tons of value and and health out of it.
SPEAKER_03:One of the things I also think that you can do to overcome is kind of like what Sam said is have an accountability person. One of my favorite things is I have a friend that's kind of gotten into fitness and similar to what Sam's saying, like she hadn't really before. She doesn't really know how to lift or anything, but I have been really busy with work and life. And and so we made a pack about three months ago that we're gonna meet each other at the gym once a week. And we're alternate who teaches. So we each learn from each other, right? And so she loves when it's my week because she hasn't really ever grown up lifting a lot of her lifts. She's learned from her husband and things. And so I meet her once a week, and and it for me, it fills up my cup on friendship. Like I need that every week. But for her, it's like a twofold. Like, and I enjoy it, it's good for me to get my workout in, but it is a twofold for her because she's like, I've never done that exercise and I'm not afraid to try it because you teach me and we learn through it. And so I think finding an accountability partner can also help that barrier of of the want, right? Like doing it with somebody does make a difference.
SPEAKER_01:So for single parents or families with intense schedules, what are some realistic low pressure ways to stay active together?
SPEAKER_03:You know, I have a good friend who her kids both now bike, and I and she bought a bike and she bikes with them. So I think, and she's a single parent. So I think that that was an easy way for them and and she would do walks as well. And so I think sometimes it's just the simple things getting outside and moving a little bit as a family.
SPEAKER_02:You know, you can find almost anything on YouTube, including free videos for workouts that you could do in the home or yoga or stretching or you know, any of those things are available. And again, if the parents are doing it, the kids are likely to want to jump in with them.
SPEAKER_01:So, how can families stay consistent with activity during busy seasons, bad weather, or just life transitions?
SPEAKER_04:Well, have a backup plan, right? You know, when uh well I don't get I don't currently get an option, but there's times you you have to adjust my days, right? I can't you know, the I can't do crazy, I can't go get struck by lightning or or come out in a hail storm, right? You you have to have a backup plan. So if my plan was to walk today, maybe there's a place I can walk. You know, oftentimes malls are open and they let you just walk in there, you know. There's just tons of things you you just have to have a backup plan. And most of all, you you gotta you gotta decide that this is what I need to do today. And guys, it doesn't have to be long. No, it doesn't have to be 45 minutes, it it can 15, 20 minutes. Get get out there and do a little something.
SPEAKER_03:Well, I think you said it earlier, like playing tag in the house or even simple things. I have a walking pad. I don't honestly, I kind of stopped getting it out because my kids are so obsessed with the natural meats because they wanted to get on the walking pad too, and then I was afraid they were gonna face plant because they would just keep turning on the highest level. But ironically to say, they do think my walking pad is the coolest thing in the world. And so I think what's ironic about that is you can find something they enjoy. But the videos, like what Suzanne was saying, I have put on little kid workouts for my kids and they think they're the coolest thing.
SPEAKER_04:I don't even really had those.
SPEAKER_03:They do, they have kid workouts on YouTube for free.
SPEAKER_04:Do it with your kids.
SPEAKER_03:They'll like you can even be like a Sonic versus Godzilla, and so they pick a team and you have to do what it says, and then you see who wins at the end.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, wow. It's way cool. But I want to add something to this, you know, because we're talking about busy seasons, bad weather, and life transition. Those things are very stressful. I mean, bad weather could do a lot of things. That's that's something we deal with. But the other two are really high stress. So the exercise helps you release that stress, right? And it releases for your kids as well, because they're going through it too if you are.
SPEAKER_03:Well, and I said this all the time, but usually people who are close to me, if I haven't been consistent in my workout that week, they can usually tell because it does affect me too. And so I think it is important. But I also want to say don't ever beat yourself up because there's been times where I only got like three workouts a week, which is hard for me. I want to work out every day. But I'm also like, well, I what else did I accomplish today? Did I get to put my kids down to bed? Did I get to do all these things on my to-do list? And so just saying just because I didn't get to do it two days in a row doesn't mean I don't go tomorrow, right? So just not beating yourself up when you can't be consistent.
SPEAKER_01:So if a family wants to be more active but feels overwhelmed, what's one small manageable step that they can take this week to get started?
SPEAKER_04:Go for a walk.
SPEAKER_03:That's what I was gonna say.
SPEAKER_04:Sounds like a pun, right? A manageable step. You know, set a small goal. One thing about humans is we we like goals and we we work better when we have some kind of accountability. Yeah, get out there and do something small. Doesn't have to be intense. And Chloe said this earlier, and and people who know me know, hey, I'm all or nothing, right? I failed, I'm I'm not doing it no more, all right? Whatever. Hey, don't don't do that. Just do it. You know, do do make a small goal for yourself. Something realistic, something you can do, and have a backup plan for it. And just do, I would say, a 10-minute walk.
SPEAKER_03:One of the things I I think is so powerful is I recently read really 30 minutes is fine. Like, so every we have it in our head, it has to be this long thing. But I read like even a 30-minute lift session is so good. Like that's all you really need. And then you can follow it up with a 20-minute walk, and that's all you need every day. You don't need hours upon hours. But one of the things I was gonna say, small step, one of the things I do with my kids pretty frequently is they love to go check the mail. What's a quarter mile there, and then it's another quarter mile back. And so we do that. Like, and they think it's the funnest thing because they're checking the mail, but we're also moving.
SPEAKER_01:I think starting small is so important. You're not gonna go out and run a marathon if you haven't done it, you know, haven't gone for a walk or but starting small is so important. Having accountability partner, I remember in that's probably my mid-30s, I hadn't been doing anything for a long time, and Sam actually helped me out doing couch to a 5K thing basically. And he really just every day helped me with little, little things and got a little bit better, a little bit better, a little bit better, and before too long I I mastered that 5k.
SPEAKER_04:So that's one of my favorite memories of us, Josh, is that that run. Remember, we ran by that sign that said slow, and I said, It's lying. We gotta keep going. We're going fast, man. Yeah, that was fun. Yeah, having a friend, getting out there and being active, real fun.
SPEAKER_03:I love that. So again, that same 5k that Josh and I ran recently. What I was finding interesting is one of my really good friends did it, and she, two of my good friends did it, but one of the ones I we run all the time together. And the other one had never done a 5k and actually had only been ran two miles, is the most she had done before that race. And she said, I don't want you to wait on me. But and I said, Riley, you got it. I told her I was like, you can do this. It doesn't matter when you finish, but you can do this. And you would have been amazed at how much she lit up at the end of that race. And she was like, I was further behind you, but I was there. I said, But you did it and you were worried you couldn't do it. And so you just never know what you're capable of. So don't be afraid to try it.
SPEAKER_04:I got a fun challenge for for listeners. Wherever your nearest city is, find the local turkey trot and sign up for that thing. It is probably one of the most fun events I've ever done. Even if you can't run it, you can walk. Sometimes they have different it doesn't have to be a 5k, just depends on where you go. But some of my most fun memories, in fact, that's what me and Josh were training for that year was the turkey trot. So we ran the turkey trot, well, kind of together. And I ran later on, I ran a Christmas run. No, I ran a chur turkey trot in St. Louis when my son lived there. So fun, you run through six flags. You know, so there's these, they they set them up, they're professional, they're they're fun. But get out there, make that make that your goal.
SPEAKER_01:All right, thank you for joining us today. I hope this episode has inspired you to be more active with your family. And maybe because you're so inspired, you'll jump up right now and go for a walk or over to a friend's house and tell them that they should also start listening to Brain-based parenting. Or perhaps you're so motivated right now that you should just get out of your chair, do five jumping jacks, but then give the podcast a five-star review. As always, remember, you might have to loan out your cortex today. Just make sure you get it back.
SPEAKER_00:Thank you for listening to Brain-Based Parenting. We hope you enjoyed this show. If you would like more information about Cal Farley's Boys Ranch, are interested in employment, would like information about placing your child, or would like to help us help children by donating to our mission, please visit calfarley.org. You can find us on all social media platforms by searching for Cal Farley's. Thank you for spending your time with us and have a blessed day.
